A Fools Leap Helping Me to ‘Know Thyself’

A Fools Leap Helping Me to ‘Know Thyself’

I’ve always admired the easy leap of faith taken by the fool of the tarot, seemingly content in ambling off the edge of a cliff. Didn’t they see the edge or are they embracing the descent into new ways of being and thinking, turning their life upside down joyously?
 
 
 
 
When it comes to turning my life upside down, I’m a quintessential Libra, living up to my sun sign as I spend many moons weighing the pros and cons, dreaming into change, making lists, consulting the tarot, seeking guidance from my deities and advice from friends.
 
 
So I want to tell you about a big decision I’ve made recently, but also some of the impacts and insights that have come with it, as well as share with you some of the tools I’ve used along the way.
 
 
The decision it’s taken me all year to make is to give up my permanent contract at the library where I’ve worked for 18 years and switch to a zero hour contract. I have done this before and I know there will be enough hours available that I will be ok for money, but the lack of certainty has still made it a difficult decision. The reason I’ve chosen this option, is that I can’t yet make a living from my business only, but the extra flexibility and more time I can spend on my business will really help.
 
 
The thing that pushed me to decide, was seeing that I wasn’t following some advice that I often give to others; that in order to make change in our lives, we first have to make space for it. I had been expecting my life to change drastically, but without creating the conditions for that change to happen. Once I realised that, there was no other reason I could see not to take the leap – fool or not.
 
 
This was during the Summer, and I spent these months asking my employer for details of the process. By the time Lughnasadh arrived, I had officially given notice, effective from Samhain (I had to right?). There are a lot of details about the process that I won’t bore you with, but that make the transitional months between contracts a REALLY tough time ahead. Giving my notice had been really empowering, and I felt great about taking a leap of faith in favour of my business, but by Lughnasadh I was really worried about how I was going to cope financially during the 3 month transition period.
 
I did a lot of reflection at Lughnasadh around the themes of this seasonal celebration: harvest, abundance and sacrifice. I was very grateful to receive insights that reminded me of the role of sacrifice in the harvest. There’s no apples without the shedding of leaves beforehand, for example. So, I was able to reframe these difficulties as a necessary sacrifice in preparation for (hopefully) a future harvest of increased income from my business. Don’t get me wrong, this insight didn’t wave a magic wand making all my fears disappear, but it certainly soothed me.
 
 
My final realisations around this have come from revisiting a wonderful free zine download called ‘our bodies as authentic business mentors’ by the wonderful Yarrow Magdalena (sign up to their newsletter for the download here). The beautiful text and gentle journal prompts asked me to check in with my body, where I was surprised to discover grief. When I went deeper with this I came to see that I had unwittingly created a narrative at some point, about how I expected my business to grow steadily, meaning I would naturally arrive at a point where I would give up my library work entirely to focus on my business. A neat little story I hadn’t even realised I’d internalised and was even grieving the loss of!
 
 
Wrapped up in these experiences you can see the power of reflection and listening to the body. It feels like we can move through our everyday life incorporating narratives and limiting beliefs without even realising, even when they can cause us difficulties in moving forward and growing.
 
 
I’d really recommend trying practices that connect you to your body to identify your feelings. Once you have that you can ask where these feelings are coming from. Also, any tool or resource that allows you to question yourself is well worth the time. Remember that leaping fool? Tarot is a favourite tool of mine, both in reading for myself, and for the client readings I offer through my website (here). It never ceases to amaze me the way that divination can bring new perspectives sharply into focus, like an outspoken dear friend.
 
 
Finally, if you’re eager to do such work but need some radical support, do check out the Labyrinth Life Coaching page of the website (here), as I’d dearly love to support you on the path to such insights and on the quest, as it says on the ancient temple ruins of Apollo at Delpi, to ‘know thyself.’

Got Your Back? Un/Conventional Support Systems & Letting Our SPIRIT SPEAK

Got Your Back? Un/Conventional Support Systems & Letting Our SPIRIT SPEAK

Imposter syndrome is a reality for many of us and since starting Spiral Path at the start of 2021, it has surprised me many times by sneaking in and undermining me before I’ve even become aware of its presence. This has led me to understand the real importance of support systems. We’re going to look at the advice of mentors and like-minded folks, as well as spiritual support and acceptance as a part of this.

Recently I was feeling very stuck with something in my business. I realised I had unwittingly created a narrative about how I expected it to unfold and when it didn’t, I simply didn’t know what to do. I sought a range of advice and I got more than I bargained for! I didn’t just get an answer about how to move ahead, I received the realisation that the narrative, the plan I’d created for a particular offering wasn’t based on anything other than replicating what I had seen others do. I was so shocked when someone questioned why I was fighting so hard to make something work when, as they suggested, it could just run in a different way! A different way!? Why hadn’t I seen it?

On top of that, another source I turned to for help gave me some advice that was just so far from who I am and what Spiral Path is about, I started to doubt myself. If this professional business advisor was suggesting something so alien to me, surely I’m at fault?! Thankfully, after some rest and encouragement I came to see the huge difference between advice given by like-minded people versus conventional support. Those with a similar approach to business were just as grossed out by the tone of the suggestion as I was, soothing my worries and giving me the courage to ignore the suggestion. There is so much vulnerability in being an anti-capitalist small business owner with no business experience! I realised I’d given allot of weight to this advisor due to their job role, but in actuality, this did not translate to knowing me and my business, therefore it was down to ME which piece of their advice I take on, and which I release. Phew, what a relief!

Support systems can bring us realisations and relief and can look like any number of things. Perhaps it’s self-soothing methods to bring some space and perspective. Perhaps it’s a trusted friend helping you with the figures (what a legend!). For me in the case above, once the suggestion had been made by a friend that I could totally change the method I was trying (and failing) to use to deliver my BLOOM BLOCK offering, I knew I need my most trusted tool – the pros vs cons list. It may not strike you as cutting edge business planning, but I promise it’s not something to take for granted. When I started to think about my need to talk to you all about these themes and drew together some of the threads around it, I arrived at the insight that whenever I’ve done a pros vs cons list in the past, I actually knew beforehand what I had chosen, but I needed to put it down on paper so I could give myself permission to go with what my intuition was already shouting at me. Do you have any methods for allowing your inner voice to tell you what it already knows?

This realisation led me to bring in my spiritual support systems. I understood how in my spiritual life I’ve been open for many years to being led by my intuition and guides (did you know Spiral Path was a concept given to me by one of my deity? You can’t ignore something like that!) So why haven’t I been open to that with the running of my business? But when I made that list to decide if I should overhaul the BLOOM BLOCK process, it was my intuition, not my rational thinking that told me what was right. This type of planning then allows me to be value-led rather than disempowering myself by simply following others as I had been doing. So, moving forward, it’s exciting to see where my intuition might take Spiral Path now I’ve given it the reins.

And this leaning into acceptance is not just about giving space for my intuition to speak. I had a hot minute there, after accepting what the list was confirming, telling myself that to make a u-turn is not a failure! I’m not a politician after all! I probably blocked out my inner voice to try lessen the imposter syndrome, but if my business is truly heart-led, I need to create space for my heart to speak, as well as listen to those who understand my values and spirit.

Do you have people like this you can turn to? Do you use spiritual support systems? I’d love to hear. These questions are the reason why I started Labyrinth Life Coaching. I had never been able to find someone I could go to for support who shared my radical values. LLC provides radical support because we all live in a world where oppression and marginalisation shape us. To try to create change without acknowledging that is unfair, just as unfair as putting the emphasis on personal change only when it is system change that is so desperately needed too.

I’m so pleased to say that the full range of LLC offerings is now available to help you on your path. SEED SESSION gives you a potent one-off session to explore your goals and dreams through the body. BLOOM BLOCK is a 3 month coaching deep dive where we can form a plan and smash your barriers (and yes, I stopped trying to make the waiting list work and, thanks to some excellent advice, you can now start whenever is right for you!) and SPIRIT SPEAK is a one-shot of spiritual advice.

It’s my job to be part of your support system as we walk the labyrinth path together, deep into the heart of who you are, what your values are, what your hopes and dreams are and what your intuition is trying to tell you about them. This is the support I always dreamed of, and now it’s my honour to hold space for you. With radical coaching, personalised tools and your commitment coupled with my support, we can change your path.